Archive for February, 2008

Knuckle toes got us a new friend!

This is Che, he is the most awesome lizard ever! he changes colour, and eats bugs, and climbs walls, and other lizardy things; Mostly he just looks at us while we talk to him in cheesy Argentinean accents


February 21, 2008 at 12:12 3 comments

I am it again!

Abigail has tagged me for the second meme of the week, but this one is a fun one, the idea being that you grab the book closes to you, flip on over to page 123 and post sentances 5-9.

The closest book to me at that the time was my art history text (Art, A Brief History 3rd addition, Marilyn Stokstand), wich had this to say:

The Pergamon frieze is carved in high relief with deep undercutting that creates dramatic contrasts of light and shade that play over complex forms. Compositionally, the Pergamene sculptors sought to balance opposing forces in three dimentional space along diagonal lines, whereas Greek artists of the fifth century BCE sought equilibrium and control through balanced horizontals and virticals. Some figures in the Pergamon frieze even extend beyond the architectural setting onto the steps, where visitors had to pass them on their way up to the shrine (see sculptural figures at far left, fig. 5-9).

And then I decided that text books shouldn’t count as that was posably the most boring thing anyone has ever written, ever.

so instead I grabbed the closest non-text book, which was Go Diego Go, Rescue Truck Saves The Day, which obviously doesn’t have 123 pages, so the next closest one was Self by Yann Martel:

This preluded by PMS so bad they circled at least one day a month when they would “disconnect from reality”. This is an arduous feminine normality. It would push anyone to worship the goddess Anaprox. But even in these cases, I feel that the burden remains a meaningful burden.

February 14, 2008 at 21:13 1 comment

Hammurabi was totally compensating for something. . .

Is it just me, or is the blatant phallic-ness of the first known codified system of laws funny to anyone else?

February 13, 2008 at 14:28 Leave a comment


I never understood the urge to spend hours teaching pets to do random things.

The way I see it you teach it the basic communication to insure that you can co-exist with it and go about your business.

Everyone knows that it’ll die eventually.

And the more tricks you teach it the more attached you become.

And the more attached you become the more you cry about it when it dies.

And the more you cry about it when it dies the more your friends have to listen to you crying about it when it dies.

And the more your friends have to listen to you crying about it when it dies the more pathetic they secretly think you are.

And the more pathetic they secretly think you are the more they make fun of you mercilessly.

And the more they make fun of you mercilessly the more you avoid them.

And the more you avoid them the more depressed and lonely you get.

And the more depressed and lonely you get the more buying a new puppy looks like a good idea.

And then your back at square one. . . Am I the only one that finds the whole process a gigantic fucking waist of time?

That being said, I am willing to admit that the end result is sometimes amusing/amazing.

Have you ever seen a jack rustle terrier pop 74 balloons in under a minute?

February 12, 2008 at 02:53 Leave a comment

oh noI have been tagged!

wench hit me with the weird, it kinda hurt.

7 random or weird things about the yourself

The rules are as follows:
# Link to the person who tagged you
# Post the rules on your blog.
# Share seven random and/or weird facts about yourself on your blog.
# Tag seven random people at the end of your post, and include links to their blogs.
# Leave a comment on their blogs so that they know they have been tagged.

my 7 random things:

1)I think gum pain feels good, when I brush my teeth, which is often, I scrub until it feels tingly and raw. I am aware that this is horrible for my dental hygeine, but I can’t stop myself.
I have more names than John Jacob Jingle Heimer Schmit. They take up two lines on my birth certificate.
3)I pretend to appreciate smart humour and dry wit, but I laugh the hardest at dick and fart jokes.
4)Sometimes I think I smell Electricity. I can’t describe what it smells like, and I’ve never met anyone else who can, but it pops up in random places and drives me bonkers.
5)I hate Regis Philban more than I hate fascists, hamsters, mouth-breathers, and just about anything else in the world. whenever I see him on TV I have the sudden urge to kill every living thing in a five block radius before buying a plain ticket to wherever the hell he is and killing him.
6)I have a permanent crack in the nail on my left big toe from when a toy dinosaur was dropped on it at the age of 8.
7)The word ‘gush’ freaks me out. The reason why is not my story to share, but ever since 3 years ago that word makes me gag, and laugh at the same time. Consiquently, whenever I see children eating ‘Gushers’ candy, I die a little inside.

This is the part where I am supposed to tag other people, but,

contrary to the suggestion made by the title of this blog, I am not overly popular, and all the seven people I know in the blog-o-sphere have already been tagged. . . and I of coarse assume that there are no tag-backs. . . cause if thier were it would start a never ending vicious cycle of tagging that would no doubt result in a catastrauphic ripping of the space time continuum causing the sun to explode, the arrival of four angry dudes on horses, and the Toronto Maple Leafs actually winning the Stanley cup.

so I’ll just say, if anyone who hasn’t been tagged reads this, consider yourself tagged.

February 11, 2008 at 04:50 4 comments

What is a Pocket Buddha?

The pocket Buddha is a talisman, whether the pocket is in our mind or our jeans, the pocket Buddha is there to add a touch of Zen to our lives. He smiles from his dark penny and used tissue filled abode and reminds us simultaneously to go with the flow of our lives and to keep our goals, hopes and dreams ahead of us. At least one moment everyday, the satisfaction of a project completed, the taste of a meal we managed to make without burning, the extraordinary patience we somehow managed to show in the most frustrating of times, the pocket Buddha throws us a pocket-lint sized piece of nirvana, and for that I am very grateful.

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