Archive for November, 2009

Romance Is Dead

Because THE BABY IS NAPPING!!! ON HIS OWN!!! WITHOUT ANYONE HOLDING HIM OR LAYING DOWN WITH HIM!!! Pocket Buddha walks over to Das Piper and gives him a snuggle and some sexy kisses.

Das Piper: Um, why do you taste like pepperoni?

Mood effectively ruined.

What did we learn? If you’re trying to catch a little intimacy for the first time since your baby was born 10 weeks ago, make sure to brush your teeth first.

Also, eating a felafle wrap with copious amounts of Tadzhik from ‘Opa’ will apparently make your mouth taste like pepperoni.


November 28, 2009 at 04:48 1 comment

GIST #30 of 365

1) Staying cozy and cuddly on this long cold day

2) Sugar cookies

3) Baby smiles

4) Das Piper

5) Oliver enjoying a private concert by his favorite band, ‘Daddy and the Red Guitar’

November 24, 2009 at 05:50 1 comment

Tangy Time Sugar Cookies. . . Just The Thing To Ruin Any No Fun Diets This Winter

Yesterday morning, Das Piper took Oliver for a little walk leaving me alone at home for the first time in 2 months. Instead of pacing and worrying like I wanted to do, I made these cookies instead.

1/4 cup Butter
1 TBSP vegetable oil
1 egg
1 cup sugar
1 3/4 cup unbleached flour
1/2 tsp baking soda
1 lime

1) Preheat oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit

2) With a whisk, cream together room temperature butter, oil, and sugar with the zest of your lime until it’s nice and fluffy.

3) Add in your egg and the juice of your lime.

4) Mix in your flour and baking soda to make a nice sticky dough. If, like me, you don’t have a fancy electric mixer it’s easiest to mix the flour in a little bit at a time.

5) Drop balls of your dough onto a cookie sheet (about the size of a loonie is best) and press them down with a fork. Remember to leave space for the cookies to spread! Bake for exactly 8 minutes, then let cool on a wire rack.

For Christmas I think I am going to try and work with the green tinge that these cookies have because of the lime and make some red and green pin wheel cookies.

How do I do that?

Dye half of the dough red with food colouring, then roll out both colours into 1/4 inch thick rectangles. Stack the two sheets of dough one on top of the other and give it a roll or two with the roller to make sure they stick together. Roll the stack into a log like you’re rolling sushi then chill it in the refrigerator for an hour or so. Cut into rounds and place on you baking sheet and bake.

I’ve never tried that with this particular dough, but I am sure it will work out like it does with other sugar cookies. (I made some pink vanilla pinwheel cookies for my god daughter a while back and she loved them.)

November 22, 2009 at 04:33 Leave a comment

GIST #29 of 365

1) Oliver stops eating and unlatches himself then smiles a huge smile up at me before latching back on and resuming his meal, as if to say ‘Thank you mommy, this is really tastey!’

2) Breakfast in bed thanks to my lovely Das Piper.

3) Learning to skate again. er. well learning to skate, I wasn’t any good at it the first time 10 years ago.

4) 11 degrees and sunny on November 21st! So we’re still able to go for nice walks outside for now.

5) Found a free blackberry app that makes my blackberry SMS look like iphone SMS. . . Why not just get an iphone? Because I said so that’s why!

November 22, 2009 at 04:09 Leave a comment

How I Made My Flu Shot Unnecessarily Stressful

In an effort to shield Oliver from this year’s media boogey-man, the N1H1 virus, Das Piper and I got our N1H1 vaccinations last week. After hearing constant discussions about it in my mom’s group, and on the radio (btw CBC, could you maybe find something else to talk about soon?) Das Piper and I decided that when it comes to our son safe is definitely better than sorry.

Oliver being 4 months away from the 6 month eligibility mark did not get one, and for that I am kind of glad because his regular 2 month vaccinations are only days away and I am having a hard enough time gearing up for that. But as the parents of a child under 6 months, we became eligible for the vaccination shot on Thursday the 12th.

Now, I have never been afraid, or even a little nervous of needles. In fact, I remember as a child wanting to go have blood taken at the doctor’s office because I remembered getting to pick a toy out of the prize box, and clearly a super bouncy ball was worth the momentary slight discomfort of a needle in the arm. But being ushered through the dark dank abandoned hallways of an old high school, my anxiety level went from none at all, to damn near terror.

Something about the check in desk and releases and forms, and holding room, followed by an awkwardly quiet queue room the atmosphere reminded me of the dirty hazy hue of every apocalyptic movie I’ve ever seen. At first in a way that I could joke and be sarcastic about.

Of course, anyone who knows me knows that I am really good at joking and being sarcastic to the point where I really freak myself out. Like the one time I tried to tell my sister that there was a little undead man with no legs living under the basement stairs and that he was waiting for her to walk by so he could cannibalize her, and ended up terrified of the room myself I was so convincing. Or the time I was so excited about participating in a zombie walk that I talked about zombies for days and days to the point where I made someone walk with me anywhere I was going to act as my ‘zombie decoy’, ya know, just in case.

In this case, sensing that Das Piper was feeling a little nervous, I started making ridiculous comments about N1H1 being developed and spread by ‘Purel’ and the government injecting computer chips into our arms to that they could track us, or maybe it’s like that episode of the X-Files where Mulder find out that small pox vaccinations were actually alien DNA experiments to try and create an alien-human hybrid. And of coarse I just kept talking because Das Piper was smiling in amusement until a tiny irrational part of my brain started to buy what the sarcastic part of my brain was coming up with and by the time I got to the chair, my heart was racing.

The shot itself was incredibly anti climactic. I barley felt it. And aside from a bit of stiffness in my left arm for an hour or so afterwards there was no lasting effect at all.

All in all it was a minor inconvenience that will give me peace of mind. While the chances of me or Oliver catching this flu was small considering that neither of us spends too much time outside of the house, it was still enough of a worry that I was nervous about going to our mom’s group, and swim classes. Now we can go out without any worry at all.

November 17, 2009 at 01:28 Leave a comment

Eco Parenting: It’s The New Black

Since being thrown into the roll of responsible adult and contributing member of society I have also found myself in a new and fascinating marketing demographic. That of the yuppie mommy set. A quick look at the vast amounts of money that we’ve spent in the past year and what we’ve spent it on pretty much confirms that I am eating it up just as eagerly as the next yoga pant wearing new mom out there.

The secret to driving me and every other new mother mad with desire for the latest diaper, toy, or onsie? Make it sound ‘super’ adorable. If of coarse you mean ‘super’ as in super hero save the planet and all life as we know it super. Throw words like ‘natural’ ‘organic’ ‘eco friendly’ at us and you can pretty much guarantee that at least 90% of us are not only going to pick your product over a similar product right beside it, but be willing to pay extra for it too.

You can charge upwards of thirty dollars per cloth poop catcher so long as it’s certified organic bamboo (because bamboo is the new hemp).

How about 40 dollars for that eco friendly t shirt with a cute ‘save the planet’ bumper sticker across the front to let everyone know how responsible a public citizen your baby is for the two weeks it will fit him?

And of coarse 100 dollars is no cost at all for the baby food kit that will help you make all natural baby food for the health of your little one and the environment.

It all sounds really obviously stupid when I put it like that. But I really do eat it up.

Guilt is probably the most likely reason why I am so suddenly seduced by such an obvious ploy. Residual guilt over bringing yet another carbon eating person into this train wreck is really at the heart of it. Not only is this little person probably making the problem worse. But I also know that the most devastating effects of today’s environmental doochery will be felt by him and his children more so than me.

So maybe buying these products makes me feel like I am doing something. Maybe what they’re really selling me is a lifestyle in which I feel in control and empowered. A lifestyle in which I am providing the brightest future for my child.

Well let me tell you, if the me from a year ago could see this. She would slap me upside the head.

Today I find myself sitting in my son’s room surrounded by expensive organic toys folding his expensive environmentally friendly clothes wondering when I forgot my old mantra.

Consumerism cannot fix what consumerism broke.

I’ll have to do More than try to buy my way out of this if I want that feeling of control and empowerment to be meaningful and lasting.

Of coarse making socially and environmentally conscious decisions as a consumer is important. But it’s time for myself, and I am sure many others to get real about which decisions are actually effective.

Buying as much locally grown food as possible. Effective.

Buying super deluxe pocket snappy organic cotton diapers where a simple 3 dollar prefold will due. Not effective.

Making local all natural baby food with the food processor I already have. Effective.

Buying bamboo cotton clothes when the drawers are already bursting with hand-me-downs. Not effective.

But most importantly. I think it’s imperative that we pair these responsible consumer choices with hard action. I want my son to grow up with the knowledge that although personal changes towards a More socially and environmentally responsible lifestyle are important. He also has the power to effect change in many other ways

Here’s where I go for ideas and information on environmental issues. Getting myself excited is the first step in raising my son to be excited and passionate about the health of our planet.

Green Nexxus – Is an online community for sharing tips, thoughts, and information on anything green focusing on the real impact of little changes.

Contact your government – An online listing of Canadian government contact information, so that you know where to send letters urging our government to make bigger changes, and to take environmental issues seriously.

David Suzuki Foundation – No eco link list would be complete without him, because he knows what he’s talking about. A great site for information on both small actions, and the bigger issues as well.

Roots and Shoots
– A campaign championed by Jane Goodall to encourage young people to think critically and find solutions to problems effecting animals and humans alike.

November 13, 2009 at 23:48 4 comments

No One Ever Suspects The Frog

November 9, 2009 at 00:03 1 comment

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What is a Pocket Buddha?

The pocket Buddha is a talisman, whether the pocket is in our mind or our jeans, the pocket Buddha is there to add a touch of Zen to our lives. He smiles from his dark penny and used tissue filled abode and reminds us simultaneously to go with the flow of our lives and to keep our goals, hopes and dreams ahead of us. At least one moment everyday, the satisfaction of a project completed, the taste of a meal we managed to make without burning, the extraordinary patience we somehow managed to show in the most frustrating of times, the pocket Buddha throws us a pocket-lint sized piece of nirvana, and for that I am very grateful.

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